I promise not to blog about the anniversary of Liam's birth/death every month but yesterday was the 7 month mark and I wanted to share something that happened to us at the 6 month mark and it seemed appropriate now.
On the sixth month anniversary of Liam's birth/death I was profoundly touched by someone who not only had no reason to remember the significance of the date, she did so by honoring the date with a poem she wrote which I will share at the end of this blog. (With her permission of course) The acknowledgement of this event in our life, of our son, meant the world to us since some of the people closest to us NEVER speak of Liam. Or ask how we are doing. I get that life goes on, and it wasn't a huge event for others like it was for us, but to not acknowledge the fact that we had a son is incredibly hurtful, especially when the people who should be asking aren't and those who have no reason to are writing poems for us.
I try and give people the benefit of the doubt and justify it by thinking people are just uncomfortable to talk about Liam for fear that it will hurt us. But the truth is, NOT talking about him hurts us more. Everyone grieves differently but for us, we like talking about Liam and what he meant to us. So we give you permission to ask about him. We give you permission to ask how we are doing. We give you permission to ask anything about it. Some people don't know what to say, I get that. Just acknowledge that this thing happened to us. Acknowledge that we have a son named Liam and we lost him. Acknowledge that we are grieving. Acknowledge that you don't know what to say to us. That is better than saying nothing.
So let me get back to the poem. Amber Michelle Fisher wrote the below poem to honor Liam. She lost a nephew named Ashton, so she knows what it's like to bury a baby. I've known Amber for over five years. We started out as coworkers and now she is now one of my employees. However, we both know that she is so much more than an employee to me, she's a dear friend. I don't think she will ever know how much her poem meant to Nick and I. Mostly because she had no other reason to remember the date, other than remembering her own grief of losing her nephew Ashton. Thank you Amber for your kind words and actions after. You are special and I appreciate you.
We depend on faith though it's hit or miss.
Then turns into hope, love, and joy.
Those words were longed for, "Congrats, it's a boy"
Life is full of paths yet destined for all
Many obstacles delay us and watch us fall.
The roads all connect one way or another
Your road just changed and turned into the other.
God gives us life then takes it all away
But hear me now you are strong and it's okay.
I too was angry, sad, and bitter for so long
But your Liam has not left and nothing has gone wrong.
You have been blessed to love such a child
I know your pain as its crazy and its wild
His heart was so perfect and belonged in this world
A tornado came to you; it raged and it whirled.
I know you hurt and wish this pain no more
But one day you WILL say, "Zumwalt, party of four"
Please know that Liam has given me a message to send
He says, "wait till you meet Ashton, he's my best friend".
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