So, we had our first OB appointment today for our new little Goo. They confirmed that I'm pregnant. Whew. The appointment was rather uneventful, which in my case is good I guess. My goal is to keep these visits uneventful straight through October.
It was kind of a bummer because all patients have to see the physician's assistant for their first OB appointment and since we are so connected to Dr. Lofgren it was pretty weird to see someone else. Many times I caught myself wanting to say, "It's cool, yo. Just talk to Darla, she's got all the info." But I was polite and relived my OB history. We did get to see Dr. Lofgren as we were leaving so that was a relief. It was also a relief that she didn't serve me with a restraining order.We go back in two weeks for another visit (with Dr. Lofgren this time) and an ultrasound. I can't wait to see the little heart beat of our precious Goo.
I have to admit, I'm scared. I'm scared of losing this baby. I'm scared of being hurt again. I'm scared that my baby won't be healthy because of me. I'm scared that I'm doing something irreversible to my body. I have to have faith though. I prayed for this. A lot. I believe this is my answered prayer and God will be with me and protect me. Right now, my faith is stronger than my fear. My goal is to keep it that way.
More updates to come...
Praying for peace for you, Laura! I remember being absolutely terrified when I became pregnant with my son (after my daughter died 2 hours after birth). A lot of conflicting emotions. It was such a relief when Eli was healthy!
ReplyDelete