The funny thing about grief is you can be sailing along thinking you have conquered it and all of a sudden it slaps you in the face. Last week was pretty rough. I really couldn't even put words to it. I couldn't figure out why I was melting down all of a sudden for no reason. I was at the kidney doctor on Tuesday and he told me my white cells were high (which really isn't a big deal) and I started crying. I'm pretty sure I freaked the kidney guy out. He handled it well but did refer me to a Lupus support group, and offered me an antidepressant. Talk about embarrassing. I told him I'd save my next meltdown for my therapist.
Grieving is hard work. You have to let yourself experience it, all of it. Sometimes you have to repeat parts. My faith helps me through it. My family helps me through it. My friends help me through it. I expect I will have more weeks like last, but the good news is that kind of week is becoming less frequent. I'm doing much better now and am ready to start this week off on a positive note. Here's to no meltdowns this week!!
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